Posted by: duncandrews | August 29, 2009

Holman: all the cool kids read it

There are so many in-jokes here, so if it doesn’t make sense, don’t worry… It’s not very good poetry but it was fun to write and funnerer to read at the MTC review!


I came to college all wide -eyed and keen,
off the Big School for my very first day.
I put my bible where it could be seen,
but to my horror, I heard someone say,

‘Is that an ESV?
Brother, I feel your pain!
You have my sympathy –
It must drive you insane!’

Recovering, I drew breath and asked what was his caper
I said ‘What you talkin’ bout?’ like a young Garry Coleman.
Knowingly, he produced a book of gilded edged paper
and pointed to the word on front and said out loud, ‘Holman’.

‘Holman is the new black –
all the cool kids read it!
Oh, and get yourself a mac,
Brother, you’re going to need it.’

For my nerves I went and brewed myself some tea;
My hands were trembling, and I had shaking knees.
I used to feel a smug superiority
when my friends pulled out their NIVs!

But now I found
the tables had turned.
By eyes were cast down,
My stomach, churned.

Months later now, and we’re ALL in love with Con,
and Sheady’s been pluggin the Holman too,
and noone’s game to say he’s wrong;
So, really, what else is a guy to do?

But pay a visit
to the Moore Books store,
and come out with it,
proudly through the door.

You see at $9.95, it’s virtually a steal,
so to my six versions on the shelf I think I’ll add number seven.
And I know it represents a-platonic-eschatology-and-a-works-based-soteriology-but-I-can’t-help-but-feel,
That a Holman might get me just a little bit closer to heaven.


  1. […] my piles. But I think its time to declare it lost – my trusty little faux-leather travel companion. Is it time to join the coll kids? { quickie posted at 2:35 pm on September […]

  2. Nice! Lol.

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